“You are not alone. Have you told Nirmala about this? I haven’t told her”She shook her head and said, “No. How do you think I can tell her?”“So if you are not going to tell and I am not going to tell, how will anyone know? And my reputation is at stake too, so we will take care of that whenever we meet. And I am a married man too with a family. As for you being happily married, you will soon find out the meaning of happiness”She reluctantly brought her arms around me. I kissed on her cheek and forehead. One must proceed gradually when having sex with married women. I held her face and looking into her eyes asked, “May I kiss your lips?”She nodded slowly with lots of hesitation, but her lips quivered in anticipation of my lips on hers.I kissed her on her thin lips and let my tongue into it to explore the secrets of her oral cavity. She was receptive. And soon she began to explore mine.I asked her to sit on the side of the bed. I knelt in front of her and kissed her feet. She jumped. She ached inside and all at once she felt empty and hollow. Why had she been denied love for so long? Why were her hands the only ones that caressed her body? Why did no-one read her mind and see there was beauty there among her own personal debris of hate and fear and desperate longing. But now there was Dika. At first Suzy saw only the darkness. The brilliance of the sunlight outside rendered the shadows pitch black. Then she noticed little beams of sunlight crossing the floor making the specks of dust sparkle. There were curtains hanging from the walls, paintings, vases filled with sunflowers and a sweet musky smell of herbs and spices and liquor and women. In the centre of the room a huge table of wood so dark it looked black. There were doorways covered by curtains and hangings, book shelves, a huge mirror cloudy with age. Dika took her hand and led her further inside. For Suzy the one fixed point on this journey was Dika. If she loved Dika hard enough she believed she could at.
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